Translation Please

I was just looking over my spam folder when I noticed this one guy, on September 6th, left a bunch of messages on various posts across this site. They're all in French, though, and I don't speak French. If you know French, then please tell me what this guy is saying.

il aboierait comme or conciliant

vous eussiez assiégé ci mais humoriste

il eut abruti par conséquent donc torve

j'aurai bonifié exprès donc fixiste

vous bâteriez soit tout à fait ou caractériel

vous arrêtâtes bientôt car essentiel

tu eusses aguerri plus donc original


Oh, and he leaves a link to his tumblr blog, but it's all in French, too, so no help there.

Suddenly I'm thinking it's probably a bad idea posting material to my site that says God-only-knows-what but, eh, it's always been a free-for-all here at PROOF and it's nice to have a little interaction for once, even if it is just spam.