Here's What I'm Thinking


Yes, I know it's way vogue these days to want to save the planet and all that.
The environment's in jeopardy and we all have to pull together and do our part, etc.
Everyone I know is recycling or, at the very least, they're lying to everyone else about recycling and I'm thinking, "What for?" 
What exactly are we trying to rescue here? 
Somebody really smart needs to explain it to me 'cause as far as I can see, life on Earth sucks a fresh turd. 
You really expect me to separate my garbage for this fucking shitpile? 
Hell, as far as I'm concerned, our rendezvous with total disaster can't arrive soon enough.

Where the hell are all these nukes everybody's always whining about? 
Let's light a few of those up, why don't we. 
That would kind of end the suspense, wouldn't it? 
Break the tension? 
Or maybe our finest scientific minds could find a way to alter the Earth's orbit and steer us into the path of one of those big asteroids, you know - one of those 'Global Killers'? 

Listen, all I'm saying is that not recycling just isn't gonna cut it. 
We gotta get pro-active, people! 

Let's make it our resolution for 2009...

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